002 // i could be violet sky

[autosmuppet]

[ Phone: ]

Got ourselves a regular hullabullo goin' on over this homecoming, don't we? Hey, I'm not even knockin' all y'all for it. Hell, I'm just waitin' for my official invite. Gonna head over and get my chaperone on.

Better practice dancing arms-length apart, kids, I'm gonna rename myself the Berlin Wall and start construction at the punch bowl. [ He is absolutely not actually going to do that in the slightest, wow. ] If anyone wants to learn to do the cabbage patch, I'm officially your all-knowing sensei of dance and other related shit.

Oh yeah. And where's a guy gotta go to buy a top hat and a monocle in this town?

[ backdated to earlier in the afternoon, and tags may come a bit slowly! ]

Comments

that was the most beautiful tag I've ever gotten

[ironicjournal.livejournal.com]

Absolutely, ma'am. I get formal, I get formal like it's nobody's business.

fools got nothin on my Herribro.....

[battymadam.livejournal.com]

Ohhh... well, I think you'll look very distinguished like that!

[teehee, it's been a while since she's seen that style of dress on a person Bro's age.]

I've only seen one clothing store... oh, but you know what, apparently I am supposed to make clothes too! I wonder if I have a hat pattern?

true dat.

[ironicjournal.livejournal.com]

[ :|a ] You think you might?

[battymadam.livejournal.com]

I just might! They never go out of style, after all. Gimme a sec.

[she puts down the phone and for a long time it sounds like there's a lot of papers being wooshed about comedically as she searches for hat patterns.]

Got it!

[ironicjournal.livejournal.com]

[ this is seriously the best old lady ever, damn ]

Lemme guess- you're a superhero back home. Capes and tophats and jumpin' over buildings all the time.

[battymadam.livejournal.com]

[GASP HOW DOES HE KNOW ABOUT BATTY MADAM -- play it cool, Foster. Play it cool.]

Oh no, no no! I run a foster home. And I don't jump over buildings all the time.

[ironicjournal.livejournal.com]

[ YOUR SECRET IS SAFE. ]

A foster home, huh?

[battymadam.livejournal.com]

Yup! I take in lost imaginary friends that were abandoned by their creators after they grew up, and then my granddaughter and Mr. Herriman find new homes for them.

[ironicjournal.livejournal.com]

Now that's downright respectable right there. Gotta give props for the imaginary friends.

[battymadam.livejournal.com]

That's right! Imagination should not be squandered. If the friends can find a new place in the world, then it will be a happier place.

[ironicjournal.livejournal.com]

Coulda used more along those lines back at home. Place'll get boring pretty fast when you're not payin' attention.

[battymadam.livejournal.com]

Oh? What about your home was boring?

[ironicjournal.livejournal.com]

That would be the people, sister. Buncha Toms, Dicks 'n Harrys all over that city, and then there was me and the kid and Lil Cal.

Which I guess I can't get all up in arms about, since someone got the planet destroyed and all. [ Eh. It happens. ]

[battymadam.livejournal.com]

Sure, there's no use cryin' over an upturned sasparilla. Though that seems like the kinda thing that would still be ok to get your wires crossed about. I say, you looked a little young to have a kid though. What's the deal with that?

[ironicjournal.livejournal.com]

Ah, you know how it is. Goin' through life all wild and footloose, burning down the city with reckless youthful hijinks... and then a meteor with a baby and a dead horse on it wrecks the best record shop in the state.

So I hauled the little guy outta the crater and took him home. [ Exactly what any responsible adult would do. ]

[battymadam.livejournal.com]

Oh wow! Did he grow up and you found out he was Superman?

[because all meteor babies have to be superpowered aliens, naturally]

[ironicjournal.livejournal.com]

Don't I wish. Nah, he's just some regular ironic little teenager right about now. Hoppin' around planets and installing dangerous video game software, just like I taught him.

[battymadam.livejournal.com]

Are you from the future? I'm curious how you got to the other planets is all. It sounds wild!

[hideous destruction aside.]

[ironicjournal.livejournal.com]

More wild than goin' on safari without a guide, sister.

But I dunno, is 2009 the future to you or what?

[battymadam.livejournal.com]

Oh! That's next year. It really is!

[ironicjournal.livejournal.com]

Huh.

Don't you worry over it too much, though. We're probably talkin' different dimensions earthwise. Plus worrying wouldn't really change much if we weren't.

[battymadam.livejournal.com]

Heh heh, I'm not worried, dearie! Right now that stuff is too far away to be bothered about since we are in the 1950s in another other dimension.

[ironicjournal.livejournal.com]

Can't even hold all these dimensions, it's wild.